extreme life change

last year mom said it was gonna be a good year for me to get married.. hahahahaha !!! obviously her wish didnt come true.. dont talk abt getting married la, i didn't even find anybody to marry pun.. well, i found five jokers though :)

this year, no special prediction, just a good year for me.. we'll see if it's good.. it did started good..

the ultimate utmost extreme change i did was to dropped all five jokers for a man.. a malay man somemore.. hmmm, kutuk punya kutuk, sangkut..

recently, starting from two months ago, my life changed extremely.. i went back to my events mgmt life, resigned from my deskjob, found someone who really loves me, stage-managing a cabaret show, directing my first play, found a wonderfully-crazy team to work with, also caught the package disease (flu, fever, cough) after 4 years...

as what am telling everybody, it's a crazy month. with not enuf sleep and less memory capacity to think, am dying.. but i am having fun.. still live day by day like before but a bit more organize.. will spend time with my darling every friday to sunday and do everything else either in between or during the weekdays. that includes attending rehearsals and bonding with my creative side, which, mind you, is damn exhausting.

this particular week, i organized a launch gambit for a client in which i cheated a bit. but hey, client was superbly happy, thanking my crew and me for a great launch moment. since they gave me a very ciput budget, i did what i could - instead of perspex we used mirror, instead of velvet we used satin, instead of electrical confetti we used manual party poopers, instead of pyro we used orange skydancers, instead of static globe we used round lampu pagar.. hehehhehe, smart huh..

today, i spent 10 hrs in a dance rehearsal taking notes on the casts and dancers positioning for the cabaret show.. the casts catch up very fast and the dancers, being dancers, dance beautifully.. we are one week to show. all production team are on the ball.

now i can still breath. once the show start, i will be in charge of the show. all cues are on my head. all cues means front-of-house cues, sound cues, lighting cues, wardrobe changes & scene changes. for 10 days, 2 hrs every day, my head will be on the line. of course i will have my technical & stage team to help me make sure that my head will still be attached to my body.

if i live to see the end of the show, i will have to go straight to directing my play pulak..


c'est la vie ! cheers :)

destiny - written, sealed !

after spm i've worked in an engineering co. and a pizza parlor. then spent many years pretending to be a student taking up diploma, advance diploma, degree and master, in accounting and management. after all that, i don't know why i even bothered coz it i still couldn't find any job.

then, a friend introduced me to her cousin who then offered me a job in her company - events management co. i found my destiny.

the exhaustion, physical and emotional stress level are high but the satisfaction of executing the works are extremely sweet, indescribable...

after a few years, in 2003, convinced that experience and knowledge already on-hand, i registered my own events management co - EVENTS TO GO.

then, in 2006, i ventured into theatre management. learning about stage production. for a person who already has events background, a performing stage is much easier to manage. only the people are more sensitive and deep, a different kind of fun.

early this year, realizing again that deskjob is slowly killing me, i decided to open up a production co. of my own - D'LAHARIANZ PRODUCTION.

i realized that with handling crisis management as my best skill, i cannot sit on my butt 9-5 and i have to be my own boss.

now with 2 companies, a freelance job, a rational biz & life partner, a crazy & hardworking bunch of team, - i am happy and extremely exhausted...

c'est la vie ! cheers :)

new beginning...

there is hope.. is it ?

2008 started wonderfully excellent for me. the best since at least a decade ago. life is good. love is good. logic and magic coincide. am flying high, god, please don't let me fall !

I fell in love…

Yes, very common but not common for me. I like people, I don’t love people ! How can a person with a heart made of the hardest substance, can fall in love ? I try to reason with my own logic – attempt failed. So I start asking S, how did he make me fall for him. Answer was - connection, chemistry… hmmm, maybe I lost the definition of love that I lost what in the world is he talking about. ~

Ok, a bit of history.. the last I fell for someone was a decade ago. It didn’t work out, so I start flirting. Heart close until further notice. Set myself a very high criteria so I will not fall again. A very subtle way of vengeance. Hide myself inside myself. Hide in my destiny – the entertainment industry, where pretending is a common. So I can pretend and not let any soul know who I really was or am.

A decade. A decade and S changed me in a second ! hmmmmm… Love the way he loves me. Love everything about him. And I learn to love myself now. Oh well, that is a person in love talking… Love his answer to a certain question – “I am the most qualified !”.. Smart !

Maybe I think I am too smart so I needed somebody smarter. And to think that I can’t get any smarter guy in a decade, - was it something wrong with me or something wrong with the general male species ?... I wonder..

My dearest darling S, i love u so very much, i believe u do love me too. So pls God, begging U, i think i deserve my happiness this time around..

So, as for now, two months later, I have elevated from cloud nine to cloud ninety-nine :) This is going two ways – either I am gonna be the happily ever after fairy tale princess or I am gonna crash boom bang and die !

Will update :)


there is hope, is it..................????

c'est la vie ! cheers :)